Artistic Stimulation

Two and half years ago, I graduated from Penn State and have been trying to make myself fit into the corporate world since. I realize now that this was a mistake, and a waste of precious time. Instead of training to hone and improve on my singing, I obsessed over the idea of grad school, believing that was my only way to a successful career. It is true that one can’t do much with a B.S in psychology. At least a Masters or Ph.D is necessary. But I don’t want to pursue psychology. I don’t want to pursue a field just for security. That’s not a good enough reason for me to invest years of my life, not to mention tons of money in pursuit of something.

At the same time, making singing into a career is risky, and I want a career so badly. I want to have kids someday, and I don’t want to be a stay at home mom my whole life. (By the way, there’s nothing wrong with being a stay at home mom, it’s just not for me). I’ve always dreamed of a successful, fulfilling career, just like I’ve always dreamed of having kids. And there’s only one thing I’ve ever been able to really see myself doing, and that’s singing. That has never changed or not been the case, not for a single day of my life. I can’t ignore it any more, and I regret feeling like I needed to.

Whew, I didn’t know I could be so longwinded! In any case, the “artistic stimulation” mentioned in the title of this post has come in the form of ballet classes:) I took ballet briefly when I was in middle school, like, over ten years ago. I learned that dancing is not my forte. I’ve always felt fairly awkward in my body, and my muscle tone has always been poor. But I do miss ballet, and I think it would be really good for me to get back into it and really throw myself into the arts. Not to mention I love participating in musical theater, and most musicals involve a good amount of dancing, so having some training in this area can only benefit me. I am now enrolled in a five week intro to ballet class, and ridiculously excited about it:)

This ballet class has also inspired me to take the next step in my hopeful singing career: voice lessons! I am now looking for a really good vocal coach, hopefully in the DC area. I’d like to audition for a vocal coach, and hopefully be accepted as their student. I feel like I’d get serious, hardcore training from a voice teacher that requires an audition because they would only accept me as their student if they saw (or rather heard) real potential in me. And this isn’t a hobby to me. I want to be trained so I can perform professionally. If anyone reading this blog knows of any good vocal coaches in the DC area, let me know! I can’t wait to move forward with this, I’ve put it off long enough.

I think that’s it for now. Hopefully in my next post, I’ll report on actually doing something, instead of talking about how I want to maybe do it soon. It’s time I make something happen for myself. 

How I Got Here

Alright, I have two blog followers! Doesn’t matter that the two followers are my husband and mother-in-law, it’s enough incentive for me to write another entry:) 

I thought I’d throw a little background in here, talk about some of my past endeavors and experiences with performances and auditions. We can call it: Performances and Bloopers-The Highlights. I’ve always loved performing in front of people, and have been doing it at every opportunity my whole life. Statistically, there are bound to be some notable moments.

First for some rather embarrassing confessions. In elementary school, I used to sing “Part of Your World” from The Little Mermaid at the top of my lungs on the school bus. I certainly had the attention of every kid on that bus. Positive or negative attention, it didn’t really matter to me at the time. I had no shame. Most youth strive to blend in. I went out of my way to get noticed, to stand out, any way I could. I wasn’t a very popular child…

I also used to sing on command. Yes, you read that correctly. Every now and then when my mom and I were out running errands together, she’d ask me to sing something. Not randomly, but if the subject came up or whatever. The embarrassing thing is, I would. I actually would. If it meant bursting out in showtunes in aisle 3 of the grocery store, I’d do it fearlessly. Maybe this is me being in denial of there having been something very wrong with me as a child, but I like to think I just loved singing so much that I didn’t really care about conforming to society. Yep. That’s my story, and I’m sticking to it.

I never got around to taking voice lessons, but I was in chorus throughout all of middle school and high school. I was also involved in the school plays almost every year. Play rehearsal was the highlight of each school day. Then it was my senior year and time for me to decide on a college and major. Most people go to college to figure out what they want to do, and find themselves. But I came out of the womb knowing what I wanted to do with my life. However, it became clear to me that wanting and being able to were two painfully different things. I guess my timing was poor. As a kid I sang whenever and wherever, regardless of what other people thought about it. As a college freshman I listened to what society seemed to think about majoring in drama, or music. That it wasn’t practical. That the arts are supposed to be hobbies, not actual careers. So I majored in Psychology in order to have job security and a fulfilling career when I graduated. But that never happened. Ironically, I had majored in a field that I wasn’t passionate about in order to gain something I never gained. I am now 24 years old in no better shape than I was before. So I wish I had at least majored in what I really wanted to in the first place.

But all that is ancient history! I have since refocused my energies in my singing and performing experience. I admit it would be so much easier if what I wanted to do with my life was something I could just get a degree in and I’d be set. But performance art doesn’t work like that. There are no guarantees. It’s risky, and frustrating, and we all need money to survive. I’m extremely fortunate to have my husband, my support system, both emotionally and financially. But I don’t want to be dependent my whole life. I want to make a name for myself. I just want it to be in music, singing in particular. So you’re probably wondering what I’ve recently done to make this happen. Sitting on my butt feeling sorry for myself certainly won’t get me anywhere. I’ve made a resume of my performance experience. In the past year I’ve auditioned for Royal Caribbean Cruise Lines, and this past November I was in NYC auditioning for America’s Got Talent. Yes, I’ve become one of THOSE people. But auditioning is auditioning, and I’d rather fail than live my life never knowing what I might have been capable of.

I don’t care about being famous. Or rich. My professional goal in life is to make a living doing what I love: singing. To sing professionally is my dream job. I would love to start my own wedding singing business. I’ve already sung at two weddings:) It’s a start. And I'm going to see where it ends.

A Brief Introduction

Blogs have been around for how long now, and I'm just now getting one:) I have to say, it's a little daunting, putting yourself out there on the internet, but here I am. I wanted to write about something personal and important to me, something that hopefully others can relate to.

It's been said that "you are what you do." However, I think a more accurate statement is "you do what you are." We all have unique identities; various beliefs, values, interests, etc. that make up who we are. For many people at least, our identity is already present. Then we get a career, and hope it's representative of ourselves.

But sometimes what we do is not who we are. And this has been my personal struggle in life, one I'm sure I am not alone in. So this is the place where I'll discuss my love of music and singing, my desire to perform professionally, and what I've done thus far in the name of that desire. This blog was created in part to hold me accountable for my actions, or lack thereof. As I'm sure many of you are aware, pursuing any kind of art as a career can be extremely frustrating and discouraging. I'm hoping Key of G will help keep me motivated, "keep the dream alive," so to speak. Any and all comments, criticisms, stories, etc are more than welcome here! I hope you all follow my blog. I'll try and keep things interesting:)